Carlos Gonzalez Has Fatty Mass With Tentacles Removed From Finger

Posted: June 11, 2014 in Baseball, Sports
Tags: , , , ,


Rotoworld-  Rockies trainer Keith Dugger guessed Wednesday that Carlos Gonzalez (finger) will be out five weeks.

Dugger told reporters that Gonzalez had a “fatty mass with tentacles” removed from his left index finger on Tuesday. It was a benign tumor that had been causing CarGo discomfort for much of the season. He’s likely to resume swinging a bat at the end of June and should be back on the Rockies’ active roster around the All-Star break. 

Jeeeeeesus.  One thing is to have a growth, but tentacles inside?  You play in Colorado.  Landlocked Colorado!  What the hell is going on, Chucky?

The Mets might as well just trade for Gonzalez now.  Someone who is better in a hitter’s ballpark, gets injured a lot, and has things like a “fatty mass with tentacles” getting removed from him.  I can see his name on our disabled list already.


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