The Big Blue Report: Week 1. So, Ummm, Are The Giants Going To Suck Again This Year?

Posted: September 9, 2014 in Football, Giants, Sports
Tags: , , ,


Well, that was painful.  I admit that I went into last night’s game wearing blue-colored glasses.  But those glasses have since been shattered by the Lions defensive line. A brief (if only because talking about it too long will make my physically ill) recap of last night.


The 2013 Giants are Exhibit A of how a bad offensive line can completely destroy a team’s offense.  The 2014 version was constantly overmatched by the talented Detroit D-line and gave Eli no time to throw in the pocket.  If their blocking does not improve, Eli will not have to worry about leading the league in interceptions again this season, because he will be dead by Week 8.

The O-Line also gave very little daylight to the running backs, causing the Giants to average 2 yards per carry.  You may now throw up in the closest receptacle.  Rashad Jennings looked like Rashad Jennings (read: average) and Andre Williams was unable to get anything more than what was blocked for him (read: nothing).

Going back to Eli, I agree that he made his fair share of bad passes, but that is what Eli does.  Sometimes they are easy interceptions for the Lions, sometimes they are passes to David Tyree and Mario Manningham that help win Super Bowls.  It is all part of the gift and the curse of having Eli Manning as your quarterback.  The wide receivers obviously did Eli no favors, either.  They lacked separation from defenders, dropped passes that hit their hands, and rarely seemed to be on the same page as their quarterback.  Even if the line gave Manning time to get comfortable in the pocket, the receivers likely still would have let the team down.

I think it is fair to say that Ben McAdoo’s first game as an Offensive Coordinator did not go so well.  Everyone in the offense looked completely lost and I was actively wishing for my mortal enemy, Kevin Killdrive Gilbride, to appear back on the sidelines for the 2nd half.  So it is fair to say that I am going into next week with lowered expectations for the offense.  And we know what Eli thinks of his new coordinator.


Speaking of McAdoo, he may have been a complete trainwreck in Detroit, but I think he won this week’s Who Wore It Better: Toupee Edition against Morrie from Goodfellas.



I don’t really have much to say about the defense that didn’t apply to them all of last season.  They were pretty good against the run and kept the Giants in the game for a while, despite putrid field position.

JPP hurting his shoulder and had to leave the game for a little while.  I am fairly certain that he will end up being a shell of himself again this season, while the pass rush is unable to get to the quarterback in big moments.  And that makes me very, very sad.

When I play Madden against the Lions, I double Calvin Johnson on every single play.  Now I understand that there are a lot of difference between Madden and real-life.  But the one constant is that Calvin Johnson is a machine that cannot be stopped by one mortal man.  The fact that he was ever faced single coverage on any passing-down simply boggles my mind.  The new, “improved” secondary failed it’s first test of the season.  But they will have a chance to redeem itself against a good Cardinals receiving corps next week.

Special teams A pretty blah night on special teams.  The only thing of note for the night was that Detroit tried to injure our diesel punter while their sissy punter tried to flop like this was a futbol match.  Shameful.


Team Grade: D-: The only reason the grade isn’t an F is because the rush defense was decent for most of the game and Steve Weatherford wouldn’t let the snakes on Detroit special teams knock him out for the game.  Next stop, 15-1.

P.S.  Never forget

P.P.S. At least Jim Harbaugh will be our coach next year*


*100000% speculation on my part.  I figure if I say it enough times, it will just happen.


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