Posts Tagged ‘potato chips’

The Clem Report’s Review Of The 2015 Lay’s “Do Us A Flavor” Finalists

Posted: September 16, 2015 in 15 second review, Chow Time, Food, Food Reviews, Uncategorized
Tags: , , , ,
0

//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

Last year, I did a review of all the flavors for the Lay’s Do Us A Flavor contest, which helped get me started down this long, cholesterol-raising road of food reviews.  So being the man of honor that I strive to be, I have decided to do the reviews with the four new flavors of 2015: Southern Biscuits And Gravy, West Coast Truffle Fries, New York Ruben, and Greektown Gyro.  Onto the reviews.

Southern Biscuits And Gravy:

Rating: 7.8

Pretty damn good.  They kinda tasted like the turkey and gravy chips I reviewed at Thanksgiving time.    Are they better than last year’s winner (in my mind at least) Bacon Mac N Cheese?  Nope.  Or Cappuccino?  Probably not.  But they are decent.  And any time you get to listen to a little bit of Ludacris as you eat junk food, life isn’t all that bad.

West Coast Truffle Fries:

Rating: 4.2

Now this one broke my heart.  Whenever someone orders truffle fries for the table, I will likely say something like “Oh, that’s cool.  I’ll probably have a couple.”  And then I do not hear another word of conversation at the table until the fries arrive because they are all I am thinking about.  So yeah, I like truffle fries.  But these things were a goddamn traveshamockery on that wonderful food.  

New York Reuben:

Rating: 1.2.  

The brief whiff of these chips almost made me throw up.  But I gave them a shot anyway.  As you can see in the video, it’s a gradual decline from tasting to disliking to pure hatred.  When I say it tasted like a subway, I meant one of those subway trains where there is a homeless person that is asleep/dead in the corner and you can never get that smell out of your nose.  Yup, that bad.

Greektown Gyro:

Rating: 0. Zero. A goddamn goose egg. The worst actual food I have ever tasted.  Bigfoot’s dick level of disgusting.

 

So there are my reviews for this batch of Lay’s Do Us A Flavor chips. To view the rest of my 15-second food reviews, simply click play below or select the video you would like to watch by clicking the icon in the upper-lefthand corner and choose a review.

 

15 Second Food Review Thanksgiving Special: Boulder Canyon Thanksgiving Flavor Kettle Cooked Potato Chips Review (Courtesy Of The Sean And Bo Show Podcast)

Posted: November 26, 2014 in Chow Time, Food, Food Reviews
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,
0

n-THANKSGIVING-CHIPS-large570

Even though I am a junk food connoisseur, sometimes legendary foods can fly under even my radar.  Boulder Canyon Natural Foods recently released Thanksgiving flavored kettle cooked potato chips and I was none the wiser.  Luckily Sean from The Sean And Bo Show was kind enough to tip me off about these glorious flavors and sent me bags of each flavor.  As you guys know, I have gone on the Sean And Bo Show a couple of times to talk about sports and the such.  They are definitely worth a listen if you want to get a funny take about what is going on in the sports world.  Check out their podcast over the Thanksgiving break by clicking here.

Anyway, I am going to review these chips as I have done with all my other reviews.  You will see that I am wearing a Barry Sanders jersey, as is my Thanksgiving tradition.  In related news, if you don’t wear a Barry Sanders Lions jersey on Thanksgiving, you are a communist.  Anyway, on to the reviews, you communist bastard.

Cranberry

Rating:  6.2/10.  In full disclosure, I do not like cranberries.  I don’t like them as a berry, as a sauce, or as a juice (what are you, on your period?).  Anyway, the chips didn’t really have a strong cranberry taste.  Just kind of a subtle, sweet flavor.  However, the band The Cranberries are incredible.  I wanted to go with “Zombie” for this review, but that seemed more Halloween-ish than Thanksgiving-ish.  “Dreams” is my 2nd favorite Cranberries song, but I didn’t think it had enough appeal.  Okay, I’m rambling.

 

Stuffing

Rating:  9.2/10.  A quick rant here.  Stuffing is the best side dish on Thanksgiving.  Mashed potatoes are great, but that’s more of an all-year-round side.  Yams, corn, sweet potatoes, etc. cannot even DREAM of being on the same level as stuffing.  <End of rant>.  They nailed the multifaceted taste of stuffing in these chips and I am now fiending the living daylights for homemade stuffing.  Fantastic work, Boulder Canyon.

 

Turkey & Gravy

Rating:  8.4/10.  Turkey and gravy is like the quarterback and head coach for an NFL team.  If they are bad, your team/meal cannot be anything better than average.  But if they are good-to-great, all the other pieces fall into place perfectly.  This chip flavor falls in the good range.

Pumpkin Pie

Rating:  6.7/10.  <Rant #2>  I dislike pumpkin flavored items.  If pumpkins tasted so good, we would eat pumpkins.  We wouldn’t process it and load it up with sugar/seasoning/etc.  This latest pumpkin trend is out of control.  It is a disgrace to America that apple is not the official and unofficial flavor of fall <End of rant #2>.  Anyway, this “pumpkin” pie chip was pretty good.  Better than the cranberry chip, but still pretty weak.  To this day, I will ask for a slice of pumpkin pie with whipped cream, eat the whipped cream, and throw the piece of pie away untouched.  I have that much disrespect for pumpkin flavoring.

Again, I’d like to thank the Sean And Bo Show for sending along these tasty treats.  Make sure to follow them on Twitter by clicking the button below.

 

15 Second Food Review: By Popular Demand, The Clem Report’s Reviews Of The Lay’s “Do Us A Flavor” Finalists

Posted: August 5, 2014 in 15 second review, Chow Time, Food, Food Reviews
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
4

The streets are talking and their words have been heard loud and clear at The Clem Report HQ.  The people WANT NEEEEED reviews of the four finalists in the Lay’s “Do Us A Flavor” contest.

The four flavors of chips that will be reviewed are Mango Salsa, Cappuccino, Cheddar Bacon Mac & Cheese and Wasabi Ginger. Since these flavors are very unique, I will be judging them on how appetizing they are, NOT how much they taste like the flavor they were named after.  Onto the reviews. (more…)

15 Second Food Review: The Clem Report’s Cape Cod Waffle Cut Buffalo Cheddar Chips Review

Posted: August 2, 2014 in 15 second review, Chow Time, Food, Food Reviews
Tags: , , , , , ,
0

View this post on Instagram

Cape Cod Waffle Cut Buffalo Cheddar chips review

A post shared by Clem (@theclemreport) on

Cape Cod is the king of potato chips, we all know that.  But these chips were horrendous.  I love the flavor of cheddar and I love the flavor of buffalo sauce.  It should (hypothetically) be a match made in heaven, if the flavor scientists were able to do their job right.  They didn’t.  This is the first time I have ever opened a bag of Cape Cod chips and threw out a bag that still had chips in it.  Josie Grossie.

Rating: 4.1/10.  Keep this up Cape Cod and I will be buying New York Deli or Lay’s Kettle Chips.  OK, I didn’t mean that.  But you need to straighten up your act.