Posts Tagged ‘taco bell’

Final Rating: 6.8/10. It’s chock full of cheese and steak, which I love. So now you are saying “Hey Clem, stop being such a nincompoop. If it has a ton of cheese and steak, it should be at least a 9.0”. But NOT SO FAST MY FRIEND. The flatbread (or whatever it is) cannot handle the weight. So everything falls apart. Plus it’s just kind of bland. It need a little more flavor in it. Maybe a hint of sour cream or nacho cheese to kick it up a notch.  How about some bacon bits?  Potatoes?  Get creative, Taco Bell. If I am going to put my intestines through the trauma of a Taco Bell run, I want it to be worth it.

 

To view the rest of my 15-second food reviews, simply click the word Playlist at the top of the video below and choose a review.

 

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Final Rating: 2.2/10. Just your typically over-sweetened Taco Bell concoction. Nothing to see here. But what really hurts is how Taco Bell is tarnishing the good name of a Hall of Fame candy flavor (Strawberry Starburst). They hit a home run with the Doritos taco shells. But this was a huge strikeout. Shame on you, Taco Bell. Shame on you.

 

To view the rest of my 15-second food reviews, simply click the word Playlist at the top of the video below and choose a review.

 

tacobell

Eater- Social media sites are abuzz with the news that Taco Bell has blacked out its online presence in an effort to promote its new app, rumored to be launching later today. Taco Bell changed its Twitter handle to @totallynothere so as to make it appear that it has erased all content. Its official Twitter account has been blacked out. Content on the company’s Facebook page has been deleted and all images have been blacked out. On Instagram, Taco Bell released a series of black and white text-based images with the hashtag #onlyintheapp. Taco Bell’s website, a hub for its menu, franchisee information, press releases, and investor news, has also been blacked out.

Rumors have been swirling about Taco Bell’s new app since news of its forthcoming release was announced earlier this year. Though fans may be able to connect to each other via the mobile app, its unlikely to replace Taco Bell’s Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook presence for good. The app will push Taco Bell ahead of some of its competitors by allowing users to order food ahead, and by notifying users of when their order is ready to be picked up. Payment options will also be streamlined through the app, though its unclear if Taco Bell has partnered with a related service such as Square or Apple Pay or if it has designed its own payment processing system.

This is an absolute game changer for fast food.  I always found it fascinating that people could get stoned and make a rational decision at Taco Bell.  Whenever I go there sober, I turn into a pile of mush just staring at all the options on the menu.  Finally I just enter freak mode and order a chalupa, a Dorito taco, and a few random sides.  Now you can pick as many items as you would like right as the THC is entering your brain.  What a time we live in.  There are three clear winners from this announcement:

1. Taco Bell (duh)- More time to order = more food ordered.  It really is that simple.  Have you ever ordered Chinese food with a group of people?  It goes from everyone ordering their own meal to just a complete food orgy.

2. Big and Tall stores- These places are about to gain a bunch of some new customers because of #1.  Winter weather + Taco Bell mobile ordering = Biggest bulking season ever.

3. Plumbers- I don’t think I really need to explain this one.  But instead of blacking out their social media, I think they should have given away black toilet seats.  It is about to get very real in bathrooms across our great nation.

Toilet Seat1-800x800

 

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WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW!!!   You know how you dream of what you would spend your money on if you won the lottery?  I am currently doing that with unlimited Taco Bell.  Do I start with a Quesarito?  You don’t know how much longer they will be around for. Or perhaps I hammer down 5 different Doritos Locos tacos and just black out from all the different flavors.  But if we are being honest, I would pull a baller move like my buddy OG once did and order the left side of the menu.  I think that’s numbers 1-6 of the Drive Thru menu.  And it would lead to the greatest live tweet or live blog of my life.

Actually now that I think about it, my first stop would be Costco.  Load up on Charmin Extra Quilted and never look back.  Sometimes you gotta think outside the bun.  Time to go break all my big bills down and ask for nothing but singles.  Next stop, South of the Border.