The best player on the best team in baseball?  Cool.

Lead the league in WAR?  Sweet.

Touch Adrian Beltre’s head without sending him into a tizzy?  M…V…fucking P.

Heroes get remembered, but legends never die.

There are three things Lucas Duda crushes: Baseballs, popcorn buckets, and women.  Which of those three he crushes is up to you.

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Yeah, it was that bad.

I have been weighing the pros and cons of this all day.

Pro: I can give Mark Jackson a piece of my mind for the shenanigans he pulled during the old Knicks/Pacers rivalry.

Con: My phone number is on Twitter for anyone who wants to see it.

Pro: If I buy the single enough time, maybe I can get a Retweet out of him and get some more followers.

Con: I would then have a bunch of worthless MP3 files on my computer/phone.

Verdict: U2 added music to my phone without asking.  Mark Jackson asked politely and was a pure gentleman on the phone.  Go get Desiree Coleman Jackson Kadesh’s new single today.

h/t Ballow

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Don Corelone is rolling over in his grave right now.  I always thought La Cosa Nostra was a secret. But when your license plate is No God (or No Good) you don’t have to play by the rules of regular people.

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SI.com- The Duke Blue Devils will host the Tulane Green Wave Saturday for a “throwback football game” and the school is committing to the concept by using an 8-bit video board instead of the now common high-def Jumbotron.

Classic nerd move right here.  Take something that us common folk enjoy (old school video games) and pimp it out so we will become Blue Devils fans.  Sorry, not gonna work.  My hatred for Duke may actually be deeper than my love for Nintendo.  Screw you, Duke.  Stick to geek stuff and throw a TI-86 scoreboard up there next year.  I’d smoke all you dweebs in Drug Wars.

h/t Ballow

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So this “ad” has been making its rounds on the internet the last few days and it has been reported that many people actually threw their phone in the microwave like a bunch of lemmings.  Please do not feel bad for these people.  This ad should act as an unofficial IQ test.  If you don’t know that putting your phone in a microwave will ruin it, you do not deserve an iPhone.  You have to stick to landlines and pay phones.

TL; DR- If you put your phone in a microwave, you should probably stick your head in the same microwave right after it is done.